I also couldn’t stand the fact that I couldn’t see exactly where I was headed. I was trying to control every move. And none of it was working. I’d move two seconds and come to a stop.

“It’s about patience,” Mark told me as he skated in front of me, reminding me of the step technique. “Trust yourself and don’t worry about how you look. So what if you fall? It’s how you learn.”

I say that to kids all of the time. So why couldn’t I accept it in a roller rink?

I tried it again. This time, I did exactly what he told me. The tiny two-step. Slowly. One foot and then the other. A small rhythm of backward steps on wheels. I trusted myself instead of staring out at everything and everyone and looking over my shoulder. For about 10 seconds, I glided backward. It wasn’t graceful or cute, but I was doing it. I tried a few more times.